Atlantis High Official, Author at

GILES’ GUIDE TO WEDDINGS 2

GILES’ GUIDE TO WEDDINGS

When looking for a soulmate…In Sunset Cove there is no shortage

of babes and hunks so looks aren’t really a problem. You need to consider personality, their family, status, fortune, body hair, odour and any extras such as poltergeists. Hey! this is Sunset Cove and people here can be really shallow!How to Plan an Atlantis High Wedding

Firstly the woman should probably organise most of it or leave it to her parents. Leave the Groom to relax because he’s not usually good at organising anyway. But let him have a little input because he likes to feel important.

1. Pick your Bride/Groom (be careful choosing because you may have to spend the rest of your life with them)
2. Get your blood tests which are legally required in Sunset Cove
3. Find a sponsor
4. Find the location, making sure there is an escape route in case it’s necessary
5. Get married and live happily ever after

The Perfect Marriage – Jet and Beanie

These two needed only a little convincing before realising they were attracted to each other. They have many things in common and nothing comes between their love. Beanie wanted to be married to be “normal” and because he loves Jet. Although Jet may think that marriage is a conspiracy for toaster manufacturers she was prepared to put that behind her in order to marry her Beanie. And they lived happily ever after…. or did they?

Where to get married?

Everyone has their own idea on where they might want to be married. Here are some of my suggestions.

1. A church

2. The beach (always a good place in Sunset Cove)

3. A beautiful garden

4. In Las Vegas (Elvis style)

5. In space

GILES’ GUIDE TO WEDDINGS 1

GILES’ GUIDE TO WEDDINGS

Hi I’m Giles Gordon and I know first hand about weddings. Weddings have been a regular occurance in Sunset Cove recently and this is my guide to a wedding in Sunset Cove…

My Wedding Experiences Weddings are supposed to be one of the happiest days of our lives. Marrying the one you love, the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.

There have been three weddings recently in Sunset Cove. Though not all of them have gone to plan.

I was never really sure if marrying Sophie was the right thing to do especially seeing as I felt I didn’t have a choice. And knowing that Octavia is still the girl of my dreams, I had to get out of it. So when Grampa gave me a push, that was all I needed, and I ran!! Sophie and her poltergeist were not impressed!!

I’m lucky I got out when I did or I would have been eating apple pies for the rest of my life.

5 ways to get out of a marriage

We sometimes make mistakes but getting to your wedding day and realising your mistake is cutting it a bit fine. But here are some sure ways to get around it.

1. Run for your life!!! (and don’t stop for a few days)

2. Tell your bestfriend they can finally have your partner ’cause you know they’ve always wanted them – and watch them pounce!

3. Fake your own death preferably in a gruesome way just to make it “real”.

4. Tell your partners parents you’re really an alien in disguise and you were planing to eat your wife/husband.

5. Tell your partner you’re in love with the Bridesmaid or the Best Man.

Octavia marrying Josh sent my head into a spin. I couldn’t believe it. Here was my vision of loveliness walking down the aisle with someone else! What can you do?

Sabrina has always wanted Josh Montana and she was in the same boat as I was. So it didn’t surprise me to find out her devious lan to get him! Money is everything to Sabrina and sacrificing someone’s happiness for it was all in a days work. She certainly made short work of Josh’s credit cards!

GILES’ GUIDE TO FAMILY SECRETS… 1

GILES’ GUIDE TO FAMILY SECRETS…

“Hi, I’m Giles Gordon. Families often have secrets – you always hear stories and rumours. No two families are the same. So this is my guide to Family Secrets…”

MY FAMILY

5 things that might make you suspicious:

Your parents using more than one identity
Finding out your phone is being tapped
When a family member disappears for weeks on end
When you find mouldy cheese in your fridge
Someone living in a sandcastle

“My family is certainly not your average family. But then whose is? My family consists of my mother Dorothy, Grampa and Me. At least that’s all I know of.

But there have been some things bothering me, niggling in my mind. Perhaps they’re family secrets but maybe I just imagine things.

For instance my Aunty Mae out West. Now where does she fit into the picture. I realise I have an aunty but I’ve never met her, know nothing about her and I’m stumped if I know where “out west” is!!

And how does the postman find her house? All letters that Mum sends her are sent to

To: Aunt Mae
Out West

GRAMPA

Grampa is a funny old guy. We get along okay but we’ve never really talked, if you know what I mean. He’s never talked to me about his past or his friends and when I asked him what he used to do for a job he dodged the question like I dodge the beach.

As for Dennis… who is Dennis? I have no idea why Grampa calls Dorothy, “Dennis!” This is puzzling but then, so is Grampa, he’s definitely a few sandwhiches short of a picnic! Most Grampas might sit and watch some sport on tv or go and play bowls but Grampa likes to knit all day. Yeah so some people take it up as a hobby but Grampa is really good!! He even knitted me a cake. A cake of all things!!

Mum has never really said much about her past either. She never mentions my Dad. I figure they met at college but that the relationship never really took off. I wonder if I’ll ever find out?

Who is “Big D”? Grampa and Dorothy have been visiting the Hell’s Bikers and I’ve heard “Big D” mentioned. This must have something to do with their past, before I was born because I’d know about it otherwise. And what does the “Big D” have to do with Mrs Vermont?

SOPHIE’S GUIDE TO TALKSHOWS 1

SOPHIE’S GUIDE TO TALKSHOWS

GUESTS

So what sort of people should be on a talkshow? All talkshows have themes. Previously there have been some guests who didn’t work out, such as:

“Oh no I’ve lost my voice” None of these guests said anything which caused a huge riot in the crowd. Funnily enough this actually boosted ratings and the next week the theme was “Oops I accidentally became involved in a riot on tv”.

WORST TALKSHOW EPISODES EVER!“The Invisible Man Family Reunion” This episode was listened to by millions but only seen by 9.

Another one was a talkshow hosts nightmare! All the guests had temperamental phobias of answering questions!

Plastic Surgery Special – A guest had lips that looked like kebabs but thanks to plastic surgery their problem was solved…until they appeared on the show, where the studio lights melted the lips beyond recognition.

Psychic Special – A guest had E.S.P and clairvoyant skills and answered all the hosts questions before they were even asked.

Body Odour – “My Feet Smell Like Danish Blue” – Unfortunately this show didn’t last five minutes. Within 20 seconds the crowd were gagging and fainting from the smell.

IS IT REAL OR IS IT FAKE?

There are often rumours that talkshow are fake – that actors – not guests – are hired to make the show. None of the guests on Simply Sophie are actors! Some of our much loved Sunset Covers have appeared as guests including Silver Lining and his arch rival and lover Bad Mood. Grampa has appeared when he claimed that Giles Gordon was an alien and Don found a potato chip that looked like Elvis!

One of my favourites was when Antonia appeared in front of an intergalactic live satellite hookup that covered 638 planets, and revealed her love of Mr Dorsey – classic!

GILES’ GUIDE TO FAMILY SECRETS 2

GILES’ GUIDE TO FAMILY SECRETS

THE VERMONTS

Commander Vermont, Mrs Vermont and Octavia. They seem like a well to do family with a good name in Sunset Cove. But I get the feeling there is more to them than meets the eye. Commander Vermont doesn’t seem to have a past. Who is he really and where does he come from?

Mrs Vermont thinks that Octavia “… can”t handle the truth!” but doesn’t Octavia have a right to know? Mrs Vermont says she’s trying to protect Octavia but I think she may be trying to protect herself.

There are a number of secret agents in Sunset Cove too. They must have families. But do their families know? Being a secret agent must be a tough job to keep secret – spy missions, secret documents, undercover operations, secret meetings.

I’m sure there are many more family secrets in Sunset Cove. We’ll just have to wait and see how many are uncovered.

Familiar family secrets

Your sister sneaks out at night to see her boyfriend
Your father is having an affair
Your brother is adopted
Your family won the lottery
Your cousin is an alien