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COACH SHANE’S GUIDE TO SPORT 2

COACH SHANE’S GUIDE TO SPORT

LATIN AMERICAN SPORTLatin American dancing is the ultimate sport! Well I think it’s a sport. I enjoy practicing on the playing field with the wind rushing through my hair.

My teacher is great! He knows all the moves and says I’m coming along quite nicely. He says I have natural rhythm which I already knew.

The babes love it when you can strut yourself both on the playing field and the dancefloor. There’s something about holding a women close and prancing around – although sometimes I wish you could do it all by yourself – I mean sometimes it’s hard to find someone that can dance as well as yourself!

MIRROR SPORT This is a game I invented myself. I love myself, as we all know and quite often I’m in front of a mirror – I like to pull faces at myself and see which expressions suit me most. I’ve found some amazing poses that just bounce right back at me!

I am the most good looking guy in Sunset Cove – and I know it.

THE HOOLAHOOP

The hoolahoop has been around for years. It’s great exercise. It keeps your waist slim and firm.

I was a hoolahoop champion in my school days – which wasn’t too long ago. We had a marathon hoolahoop day which was to raise money for the school gymnasium. I won the top prize by hoolahooping for over 5 hours non-stop. The girls loved it!

Only problem was that after 5 hours I couldn’t stop, I wiggled all the way home.

COACH SHANE’S GUIDE TO SPORT 1

COACH SHANE’S GUIDE TO SPORT

“Hi there, I’m Coach Shane. I’m the coach of the Champion Football team. We’ve got the winning combination and it’s all because of yours truly. Here’s my guide to Sports.

My
=My MY FAVORITE SPORT

All sport is fantastic! You’re part of a team and you’re there to have a good time.

There are many sports I coach – Soccer, Latin American dancing, hockey and of course I help the cheerleaders out with their moves and their suntans.

But my favourite sport would have to be American Football. The tackles, the gameplan, the touchline!! It’s so exhilirating!

I’ve been coaching the school football team for two years now and we’re champions! We’ve won the inter-schools championship two years running.

Josh is my star quarterback. There’s nothing this guy can’t do. He’s got all the moves and talent that will take him to the top – with my coaching of course.

COACH SHANE’S 5 POINT GAMEPLAN FOR SPORT

How do you play with a winning attitude? Here’s my tips:

1 – The Moves – Get a winning combination and refine it. Listen to the calls made by your fellow team-mates and everything will fall into place.

2 – The Gear – It helps to have the right gear for protection and this includes shoulderpads, a codpiece for those delicate places, and padding everywhere else you can stick it. Those tackles hurt!

3 – The Fans – Fans at a game can make all the difference. The screaming and yelling really gets you moving. And a winning smile goes a long way.

4 – Cheerleaders – These babes are fantastic for making a guy feel important – when you feel important your game improves – and who knows you might end up going home with one after the game.

5 – Recovery – Football can take a toll on your body. After a game you should run yourself a nice aromatic bath and relax.

DOROTHY GORDON ON THE 1960’S

DOROTHY GORDON ON THE 1960’S

I’m Dorothy and I lived right through the 1960’s and they have to be some of the best years of my life! So much happened during those years and they’ve never been forgotten and are still talked about vividly by the hippies of the time…

The Decade of Peace and Love

In the early 1960’s John F Kennedy was elected President and gave his famous speech – “Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country.” Peace and War were high on the debating list and the Vietnam war had started.

Later in 1963 President Kennedy was assassinated in Dallas, Texas. A country was heartbroken.

Civil rights was big at the time and White and Black racial tensions were high. Civil Rights Leader Martin Luther King Jr. made his famous speech “..I have a dream…” More than 200,000 demonstrators were present to demand equal rights for both White and Black people. Five years later two Civil Rights leaderes were assassinated, Martin Luther King Jr and Robert Kennedy (John F. Kennedy’s brother).

I was a young hippie at the time and one of the events of the time was Woodstock. Music, Love and Peace – It was held on a 600 acre farm in New York and nearly half a million people were there. It lasted three days and sometimes it’s hard to remember it all. I spent a bit of time back then with Commander Vermont and Mrs Vermont and we like to catch up and remember the hijinks we used to get up to..

Fashion

The 60’s certainly had it’s own fashion – at the time it consisted of all the hippest gear – hotpants, miniskirts, vinyl pants, long beaded necklaces, peace symbols. The beehive hairdo was a sight to see! Women would spend hours putting their hair up and the men were into growing their hair long, and peeking out through some round John Lennon glasses. The body was for decorating and the brighter the clothes the better!

Denim jeans were making a big impact and a certain person I used to know called “The big D” owned a pair that are quite famous now.

The Beatles

Wow! The Beatles were hot! The Fab Four – John, Paul, George and Ringo. Everyone my age couldn’t get enough of them. They broke out into the music scene with hit after hit like:

Love me do
Can’t buy me love
A hard day’s night
Eight days a week
Yesterday
Yellow Submarine plus so many more!

Music was huge at the time and psychedelic music started with Pink Floyd – long instrumental solos and different electronic effects made up their style. Dancing was also popular with so much music around – The Twist, and the Locomotion were made famous during this time.

I’ve never really grown out of the sixties – there’s often a time in your life that you’d love to re-live and this was certainly my time. It was a tough decade but an exciting one.

GRAMPA’S GUIDE TO BIKERS 2

GRAMPA’S GUIDE TO BIKERS

So what do you do?

1. Apply jelly (preferably lime flavoured) to legs.

2. Lie on your side and wriggle into leathers (singing Bat Out Of Hell helps with your motivation ‘cause this can take a while).

3. Stand on one leg, up on your tiptoes and shake your other leg for 2 and a half minutes. Repeat with other leg.

4. Stretch backwards into the crab position and do 4 reverse press-ups.

5. Stand straight, admire yourself in mirror. Leathers should now fit perfectly and move with your body.

Let me tell you, I have had the best times when I’ve been cruising the streets on my bike. So many women throw themselves at you when they see you’re a Hells Biker.

The tattoo is what grabs their attention most of all. The tattoo you choose tells a person what your personality is like – they say a tattoo is the window to your soul.

My tat is faded now but boy; it was the best tat the Hells Bikers had ever seen.

It covers my chest and back and it took ten years to complete. It has such detail on it, it was perfect. No, I’m not gonna tell you what it is – it’s a secret and only other Hells Bikers know what it is.
Hells Bikers are Chick Magnets, Fact or Fiction?

It’s a well-known fact! And it’s not just the tats that do it.

I’m gonna let you in on something here, you want to know the best way to attract a biker chick?

Wear olive oil instead of aftershave, reminds the gals of Italy. And Italy = Romance, capiche?

Let your hair get dirty, be at peace with the grease! It shows the chicks that you have more to do with your time than to wash your hair, you know what I’m saying?

Paint your nails (black is good), it shows the chicks that you’re still in touch with your feminine side.

Never wash your leathers, they won’t cling properly if put them in the washer /dryer.

Buy a dog and call it Norman (never did figure that one out, but the chicks loved it).

Okay, remember kids, bikes are dangerous weapons in the wrong hands. They went a lot slower back in the day and I’ve still had my fair share of bad accidents. Stick to learning to get your leathers on for now.

GRAMPA’S GUIDE TO BIKERS 1

GRAMPA’S GUIDE TO BIKERS

Hey kids, I’m Grandpa and I’m not scared to say that I love bikes. Let me tell you a little something about them.

Vrrommm Vrrooomm
Who hasn’t dreamt of being strapped to the back of a Harley, zooming along countryside lanes and beachside roads? I’ve always loved bikes and I got my first one when I was 2 years old.

How to tell if your child will be a true biker: –

1. When you’re pregnant the baby starts to kick whenever bikes zoom past.
2. Baby starts to headbang side of crib.
3. Baby ignores milk and reaches towards beer.
4. Toddler sings Heavy Metal songs instead of patty cake patty cake.
5. Child pushes other children off the tricycles at pre-school.
6. Child insists on wearing leather nappies.
7. Child refuses to wash hair and grows fringe so it covers eyes.
8. Child wants to be read Biker weekly magazines at bedtime instead of My Fluffy Bunny.
9. First word is Vrrroooommmm.
10. Child demands that Mom pushes stroller at full speed (and preferably performs wheelies)

I love to get into my leathers whenever I can and hang out with the Hells Bikers of Sunset Cove.
Sure, they’ve seen better days, that’s for sure but we all stick together and try to protect the secrets of Big. D.

Dennis hates it when he finds oil on my clothes but I tell him, “Dennis, you should get yourself down to the tattoo shop and stop worrying about the laundry.”

My legs creak a bit now and I find it hard to get on my bike. And it’s getting really difficult to pull on my leathers now.