MR. FLUFFY MUFFIN…

 

MR. FLUFFY MUFFIN…

The sweeter than sweet Mr. Fluffy Muffin is Sophie May’s best friend. She rarely goes out without him and even when she does, he is always near.

He’s just gorgeous. He’s got these big floppy ears and this cute little pink button nose.

He can be dressed up to suit any occassion and his behaviour is always impeccable. 

He is the ideal dinner date, prom partner, classmate or beach buddy and he will listen tirelesly to all your problems with his fantastic fluffy ears.

It is unclear as to where Sophie May found her little buddy or for how long she has had him but she is obviously extremely fond of him. Perhaps he found her?

Whether or not Mr. Fluffy Muffin has a personality of his own has yet to be discovered.

He does seem to change his facial expressions to suit the occassion and particularly enjoys dressing up in smart clothes.

He looks delightful in a bow tie and the pink pads on his cute little feet match his inner ears.

All in all this bunny buddy is a joy to all who encounter him and Sophie May would never be without her best friend.

COMMANDER VERMONT’S GUIDE TO ALIEN ABDUCTIONS Part 2

COMMANDER VERMONT’S GUIDE TO ALIEN ABDUCTIONS

I lay on my back and got my breath back. I tried to move but my whole body ached so I closed my eyes and had a nap.

Aliens Don’t Like…
  • Being chased by llamas
  • Star Wars movies
  • Photographs of Wildebeest
  • Darth Vadar
  • Joyracing
  • Marshmallows
  • Heavy Metal Music
  • Drive-in Movies
  • Flowers
  • Black Holes

When I woke up I could move again and I made my way to the latrine to check myself out in the mirror. I looked like I had been BBQ’d in green olive oil and I had bruises all down my chest.

My legs had been shaved and my hair had been put in curlers. My eyelashes were permed and my nails had been painted. I didn’t know what to do, where to turn.

Luckily it was still night time and everyone else was fast asleep so I was able to grab some clothes out of my tent and took a bike and cycled back into town for a shower and a change of clothes before heading back to camp before sun-up.

I don’t know why but all my memories of Johnny had been wiped and all the memories of all the guys in my unit had been too! Nobody mentioned Johnny and I never thought about him until Christmas when I went home and Mom asked where my little brother was. It all came back to me in a rush and I ran to the top of the hill and called out into the sky for Johnny.

Of course I got no reply but it hasn’t stopped me from trying to find him through the years.

I have never been taken away by aliens again. And I have never found Johnny.

But to this day I believe that if he had wanted to come back he would have – maybe he’s happy where he is – and maybe Elvis is there with him.

I have devoted the rest of my life to trapping aliens and I know all their tricks. Just wait until I get my hands on that Mr. Dorsey – he looks like he’d know a thing or two about green tentacles and Moon Monkies…

 

 

 

VITA ON THE ATLANTIS HIGH GUIDE TO THE THEATRE 2

VITA ON THE ATLANTIS HIGH GUIDE TO THE THEATRE
Well, in England in the 1800’s plays started to deal with stories of everyday people as characters and commercial theatre started to appear in North America.Then came the 19th century with the introduction of electric lighting. Ah, that is so wonderful, no? This great addition, along with the industrial revolution, changed the face of theatre. Theatre became less about content and storyline and concentrated more on special lighting effects and scenery. This era also debuted the talents of such writers as George Bernard Shaw.
And in to the 20th century people. hang in there. You too could win an Emmy after learning all this!

Once again new technology allowed for bigger, brighter and better plays. Theatre went from being a humble play to the ever popular stage show. No longer about simple storylines, the 20th century will be remembered for shows like Tennessee Williams’ Glass Menagerie, Gershwin’s Porgy and Bess, Lloyd Webber’s Cats, The Phantom of the Opera and many many more.

Of course this is just the beginning, what will this new millennium have to offer??? What will your contribution be? Eh scumbag attention seeking morons? What will your contribution be? It might help if you learn to read and write properly first…”

 

Mr. Dorsey asked Antonia to write a report on the night of the school production ‘Romeo and Juliet’ by William Shakespeare and Giles Gordon.

 

” Well, first of all Josh had a nasty fall and couldn’t be the leading man. Of course I had to drop out as well because Antony was wracked with jealousy.

And then Giles got called in to take over from Josh at the last minute!

Poor old Giles had to be pushed on to the stage. man, he was so scared! Antony would have been so much braver than geek boy!

 

 

But Giles was okay when he saw Octavia on stage. He seemed to be really excited and relaxed at the same time.They did look kinda cute together. It’s a shame that he’s besotted with me. I mean, he never leaves me alone! The play went so well and the crowd just absolutely loved it!

 

 

So in conclusion Mr. Dorsey, I’d like to say well done to Giles! I think that he really did well in the writing of the play and I’m sure glad we didn’t have to listen to all that Shakey spear throwing mumbo jumbo talk stuff.”

 

 

VITA ON THE ATLANTIS HIGH GUIDE TO THE THEATRE 1

VITA ON THE ATLANTIS HIGH GUIDE TO THE THEATRE
“Okay, listen up scumbags! I am Vita, personal assistant tothe school principal, Violet Prefusion. Violet would not let me direct the school production of Romeo and Juliet. But she says it is okay for me to let you know a little bit about the history of theatre because I have won 2 Oscars and an Emmy. So! Pay attention. You might just learn something!”

Okay now everybody knows that it was very many years ago that theatre came to be. Theatre can be traced back to around 550BC in Greece. It appears that a man by the name of Thespis won a play competition which was held in honour of the Greek God Dionysus. This of course is where the term “thespian” came from. In this day and age there was a high rate of tragedy in Greece therefore the diversion of a good comedy was a welcome relief.


And where my little scumbags did the word ‘play’ come from? Well, it is a literal translation of the Latin word “ludus”, which means to play. And that brings us to Roman theatre. Roman theatre came about in two forms, one a direct translation from the Greek plays into Latin – this was called Fabula Palliata and the second form was called Fabula Togata – a humorous based play. After the Roman Empire fell many believe theatre fell with it. It lived on of course in the form of street theatre, this form of theatre kept the concept alive through the Middle Ages.


The church then became involved in theatre, depicting their religious holidays and other special events in the religious calendar. These small community plays soon grew into passionate reenactments of such things as the crucifixion of Christ. These were referred to as Passion Plays or Miracle Plays. And then, then came the influence of the Renaissance in the 15th and 16th centuries. The Greek and Roman plays were revived, but this time with more focus on art than religion.


Okay, with me so far? This period was followed by that of Elizabethan and Shakespearian theatre in the 16th and 17th centuries. My favourite time! Although the wonderful Shakespeare was the most notable of playmakers in this time a number of others also deserve credit including Christopher Marlowe and Ben Johnson.


Now, Shakespeare’s plays were all written and performed in very formal English. Although would you believe that Shakespeare’s works were more relaxed and natural than a number of other playwrites in his time?! Shakespeare’s better known works include Romeo and Juliet, A Midsummer Nights Dream, The Merchant of Venice, Twelfth Night, Othello and many more.


Wake up Attention Seekers! We are jumping forward in time… over the years theatre became accessible to everyone.

 

GILES GORDON ON BUYING A PRESENT 2

GILES GORDON ON BUYING A PRESENT
ADVICE CAN BE NICEI have got lots of advice on what to get:DON said buy a bag of crisps. Nice one Don, sure that would impress Octavia…JET said buy a book about conspiracies…

BEANIE said buy some ear muffs.

COMMANDER VERMONT said buy Octavia a thermo-thermo power submarine to play with in the bath tub…

MRS VERMONT said just go shopping and buy everything in site – then buy it all again for fun – and after that, return it all to the shops, get a refund and go shopping again. Hmmmm…

THE BEAR NECESSITIES

I walked into an old shop full of old things (including an old shop-keeper). Sophie was hot on my heels – she seems to be stalking me. Oh oh…

What to buy? An old scarf? A mug? A nice painting? A bad painting? A CD? A sculpture? A tea bag?

I spotted a teddy bear. It looked very cute and had an adorable expression. It seemed to fit like a glove (I mean I didn’t try to put it on my hand – it seemed to fit for Octavia). It was cute, fuzzy – a bit like me. That’s it then – if any present would do then that’s the one!

WRAPPING

I asked the man in the shop to start wrapping. He replied by twirling around, doing a dance and saying “You walked into my shop – now you’re gonna stop, listen to what I say – how you gonna pay?” It seems he thought I wanted him to start “rapping”…

He then said “Would I like a bag?” and I replied “No thanks, I’d like to buy the teddy bear”…

Well, I’m off to the diner to give Octavia my present – will she like what I got? And more importantly, does she like me? Keep watching to find out!!