Category: Explore

DON’S GUIDE TO EASTER 2

DON’S GUIDE TO EASTER
My favourite Easter!

My most favourite Easter was when I won the competition for the amount of hot cross buns eaten in one sitting. I ate 583 of them – well, most of them. You see I picked out all of the raisins to put in my collage that I was entering into the Easter competition.

But when the judges found out that I hadn’t eaten all of the hot cross buns they made me pull apart my collage and eat every single raisin there was. Of course this ruined my collage and I am allergic to raisins so I got a terrible rash and threw up all over the judges.

But it was still my best Easter because I won the competition and got my face in the paper – not many people recognised me because my face was so swollen and red that I looked like I’d been melted – but I did get a great prize.

I won the fluffiest rabbit that you ever did see and I named him Clarabelle. He was so cute and used to snuggle up to me and help me with my homework. He was my best friend until the day he decided to move away with the bunny from next door and start a touring jazz band.

Easter just isn’t the same now – I try to keep busy but with Clarabelle gone it hurts me to even look at a hot cross bun.

But this year should be better. I have been asked to help out at the kindergarten eggstravaganza so I think that I will have some fun. I’m going to dress up as the Easter Bunny and hand out some beautiful eggs that I have made out of sticky plaster and fluff that I have been gathering for the past 4 months. Boy oh boy, it’s going to be a good Easter.

Hope that you have a good time too!.Next page

 

DON’S GUIDE TO EASTER 1

DON’S GUIDE TO EASTER

“Hey there, it’s Don the Janitor here and I’m going to tell you how I used to spend Easter as a child in Sunset Cove”

Easter in Sunset Cove

There’s not much room in the cupboard where I was brought up but Mommy always managed to find space to put an Easter nest there so that the bunny could leave me some eggs.

The nest was so comfy that I used to fall asleep in it and Mommy got angry because I squashed one of the chickens one time. She told me that the bunny would leave his eggs with Amnesia the chook but after she was squished beyond recognition there were no eggs for me and Mommy had to go out and buy some from the farmer’s wife who lived in the cupboard next door.

I remember all my friends had great big chocolate Easter eggs given to them every year but I was always happy to just get my very own chicken egg and I would keep it for a whole 6 months until it smelled just right and then I would cook it up on the camp stove.

It would give me the rumbliest belly you have ever heard but I kinda liked that. I could perform the Sunset Cove Crescendo in Blue with my belly rumbles and Mommy made a lot of extra money from selling tickets to her Bingo group to the show.

One year I was allowed out of the cupboard and I went to the swimming pool where they fill up the toddler’s pool with liquid chocolate. I stood there watching all the kids diving in headfirst and coming out all gooey and choclatey.

It looked so cool and I couldn’t wait to get in there. But then I slipped on a leftover potato skin and fell into the pool clothes and all. They had to close the pool down because I hadn’t changed my clothes for a couple of years and they said that I was unclean and that the chocolate was unfit for human consumption.

Everyone yelled at me and gave me the evil eye but Mommy scooped up all that chocolate and took it back to our cupboard where she painted the ceiling like the Sistine chapel. It sure was a beautiful thing.

 

OCTAVIA’S GUIDE TO THE SECRET SERVICE 2

OCTAVIA’S GUIDE TO THE SECRET SERVICE

Undercover Operations cont…

Other famous undercover operations include

  • The Fluffy Pink G-String Case
  • The Green Banana Case
  • The Missing Cookies Case
  • The Credit Card Fraud Case
  • The Fake Smile Case
  • The Brass Monkey Case

All these cases made National News Headlines and Sunset Cove has become even more famous over the last few years just because of the Secret Service.

Criminal Justice

The Secret Service in Sunset Cove have a unique way of dealing with criminals of the underworld. Most petty criminals are paraded through town in a cage labelled “I’m a thief” or “I am the dumbest guy in town”. This is enough to keep most criminals from striking again.

One of their most famous methods of getting information out of people is using their Poly Wants a Grapher test. A macaw sits in the downtown police station and is used by the police as well as the secret service. Mr Macaw asks the suspect the questions and if the suspect is lying then the bird has a nibble on their fingers. Now these birds have very powerful beaks and the more you lie the more this bird likes to bite down hard on your fingers. It doesn’t take long for the criminal to tell all…

My role

As Octavia Vermont (only one of my aliases) I attend school in Sunset Cove and behave like a normal teenager. I am an accomplished martial arts expert, a linguist, a doctor, a lawyer, basically a genius. There is no mission I can’t handle. I know how to disarm and survive the biggest bombs, catch bullets in mid air, and fly runaway aircraft. I am the highest paid member of the Secret Service team due to my 16 years in service. I joined the service when I was 1 and haven’t looked back since. My parents have no idea of my exceptional abilities and I like to keep it that way. The less people know the better in my opinion. We have to be undercover our whole lives – living the simple small town life when really we’re on dangerous missions 24 hours a day.

Joining the Secret Service

You can’t just join the Secret Service – you must be found by them. They approach you. Even as young as one years old you could be with one of the top agencies in the world…

Next page

 

 

 

OCTAVIA’S GUIDE TO THE SECRET SERVICE 1

OCTAVIA’S GUIDE TO THE SECRET SERVICE

Hello, my name is Octavia Vermont and I’m a Secret Service Agent (Don’t tell anyone). Here’s my Secret Service Guide to being a Secret Service Agent.

 

Protection

Everyone needs protection because there are some pretty nasty people in the world. The Sunset Cove Secret Service are situated in Sunset Cove because it’s a place of high activity. People are flocking to Sunset Cove all year round just to catch the sunshine. All sorts of dodgy people pass through and the Secret Service have to protect the young citizens of Sunset Cove.

The Secret Service also protect the Mayor of Sunset Cove. She’s a very high profile woman and her engagements around the city are kept very secret.

Our Mission Statement

“To investigate and protect every living being in the Sunset Cove area from aliens, sea life, neanderthals, critters, ugly people etc. If any term, provision, covenant, or condition of this agreement is held by a court of competent jurisdiction to be invalid, or unenforceable, the rest of the agreement shall become null and void and we shall be in no way affected, impaired or invalidated and the citizens could die”.

Undercover Operations

Many undercover operations are simultaneously underway at any one time. All operations are taken seriously.

All undercover operations start with Who, What, Where and When. These officers are highly trained and their identities are kept secret. They decide what the threat is, who the threat is from, where the threat might appear and when it might happen. Who has been known in Sunset Cove for years and last year was award the Purple Square for services to the city.

The latest threat that came by Sunset Cove was a brass band. They snuck into town and started parading down the street making a racket! The Secret Service were on to them in a flash and they all disappeared quietly and unsuspiciously as brass bands should do. Protecting the city from tarnishing it’s reputation is number one of the Secret Service’s priorities. Sunset Cove is known for it’s very good looking people, it’s winning smile and it’s all year round sun.

Next page

 

DOROTHY’S GUIDE TO CLEANING 2

DOROTHY’S GUIDE TO CLEANING

SWEEP UNDER THE STAIRS

The most neglected part of a house is the cupboard under the stairs and I think that this is because most people think that there are monsters under there.
Which of course is true.

But the monsters and I have a good relationship and we often have a good gossip over a cup of Earl Grey as I show them my dance of a thousand dusters. They’re a really nice bunch and they wish that more people would just give them the credit that they’re due.

Another part of the home that gets neglected is the area behind the bed where dust gathers and spiders build their webs. They like to do this so that they can listen to snores. You see, a little known fact is that spiders make their webs faster when they can hear the sonic boom of snores.

Top Ten Cleaners of the World

  1. Dorothy Gordon
  2. Mrs. Mop
  3. Captain Clean
  4. Madame Polished
  5. Don the Janitor
  6. Beanie Weanie and his Magical Cloth of Steel
  7. Don the Don in the John
  8. McArthur the Magician
  9. Clarabelle the Polish Polisher
  10. Hells Bikers

COSTUMES FOR CLEANING

I like to wear my normal jeans and a T-shirt but one time I got to wear a French maids outfit and I quite liked that – although I did put a hole in the parquet with my stiletto heel.

Other cleaners wear boiler suits and great big clompy boots and I have even seen one cleaner (who moonlights as a singing telegram) wearing a tutu as she cleaned out the toilets in the public conveniences down Ginnety Ave.

Whatever you decide to wear, wear it with pride and be prepared for having to wash your outfit at least once a fortnight because the germs from the toilet bowl can really make your social life fall apart.

Always wear rubber gloves and carry a can of air freshener with you. I have been told that the monsters under the stairs like the smell.

Oh, and don’t forget to check under the bed, you never know what you might find – I found a stash of cash once and had a good old knees up at the community hall.
Happy Cleaning!